You're lying in bed replaying a conversation from last Tuesday.
Again.
The one where you said something awkward. Or didn’t say the thing you should have. Or misread the room. Or came across wrong.
Your brain has decided this moment deserves endless review.
Not the beautiful sunset you saw yesterday. Not the kind thing your friend said. Not the project you completed successfully. No—your mind prefers to loop on that embarrassing thing you said at last week’s meeting that literally no one else remembers.
This is rumination—and it’s stealing your present moment.
It’s your brain’s misguided attempt to “solve” something that can’t be solved because it already happened. Like trying to unburn toast or unsend an email that was read days ago.
Psilocybin has a remarkable ability to interrupt these thought loops, showing you that most of what you’re obsessing over exists only in your mind—not in reality.
Rumination is different from reflection:
Reflection: “That didn’t go well. What can I learn for next time?”
Rumination: “I can’t believe I said that. Everyone thinks I’m an idiot. What’s wrong with me? I always do this…”
One is productive. The other is a mental prison.
Rumination is repetitive, negative, and focused on things you can’t change. It doesn’t generate solutions—it generates anxiety, shame, and more rumination.
And your brain is really, really good at it.
Your mind thinks it’s protecting you by rehearsing past “mistakes”:
If you replay every awkward moment enough times, maybe you’ll prevent future ones. If you analyze every social interaction to death, maybe you’ll figure out exactly what went wrong.
Except it doesn’t work.
Rumination doesn’t make you more socially skilled or prevent future mistakes. It just makes you miserable while convincing you it’s useful.
It’s like picking at a scab thinking it will help it heal faster.
Microdosing often creates space between you and your ruminating thoughts:
You notice you’re replaying the same moment for the hundredth time. You catch yourself mid-loop and think, “Wait, why am I doing this?” The thoughts lose their grip.
Common realizations: “This happened years ago and literally no one else is thinking about it” “I’m torturing myself over something that doesn’t matter anymore” “The present moment is actually fine—my thoughts are the problem” “I can just… let this go”
The rumination starts to feel optional instead of mandatory.
Try This: The Rumination Reset
When you catch yourself in a thought loop:
1. Name it: “I’m ruminating about [thing] again”
2. Ask: “Can I do anything about this right now?”
If yes: Do it, then let it go
If no: Continue to step 3
3. Redirect: “What’s actually happening right now in this present moment?”
4. Ground: Notice five things you can see, hear, or feel right now
Most rumination dissolves when you bring attention back to the present—because the past isn’t actually happening anymore.
When you're stuck in rumination:
- You miss what's actually happening around you
- Anxiety increases (you're keeping the shame/embarrassment alive)
- You can't learn from experiences (rumination isn't reflection)
- Sleep suffers (your brain won't shut off)
- Relationships suffer (you're not present with people)
You’re essentially living in a past that exists only in your head while your real life passes by.
What Changes When You Stop
Breaking the rumination habit creates:
- More mental energy for things that actually matter
- Better sleep (your mind can finally rest)
- Improved mood (less time dwelling on negative moments)
- Presence with people and experiences
- Ability to actually learn from past experiences instead of just replaying them
You realize that most of what you’ve been obsessing over wasn’t worth a single replay, let alone hundreds.
Psilocybin helps you see rumination for what it is:
A habit. A mental loop. A pattern that feels important but accomplishes nothing.
You start catching yourself faster. The loops become shorter. Eventually, you notice the thought arise and can simply let it pass without getting on the rumination train.
You learn that thoughts are optional, not mandatory. And that changes everything.
That embarrassing thing you said? No one else is thinking about it.
That awkward moment? Everyone was too worried about their own awkward moments to notice.
That conversation you keep replaying? It’s over. It’s done. It only lives in your head now.
The past is not happening anymore. But your present moment is. And you’re missing it by replaying reruns in your mind.
What if you stopped? What if you just… let it all go? What if those thoughts aren’t as important as your brain insists they are?
So what conversation are you ready to stop replaying?
Until next time,
🍄 Media of the Week:
"Why We’re Not Meant to Be Sick: What Fungi Teach Us About Consciousness & the Future of Human Health"
by: Paul Stamets
